Weirdo Whoever Plays D&D: The Artificer, Revisited

I'll be frank, I didn't like how the Artificer class turned out in Unearthed Arcana. How much? So much that I made a revision out of it! (Insert obligatory Rocky Horror Picture Show audience participation joke here, haw haw.)

Actually I'm not the only one doing this, there are many like this, but this is mine. (Insert obligatory Full Metal Jacket joke here, haw haw.) So anyway, here is a new Weirdo Whoever Plays D&D article, taking some changes in the troublesome extra class we all hate and probably love.

The WWPD&D document "The Artificer, Revisited" can be found here (Google Docs) or here (GM Binder).

The entire WWPD&D documents can be found here.

Weirdo Whoever Plays D&D: I Solemnly Swear...

I made this last month, and I didn't post it here? Must have slipped off my mind, but then, I've been doing translation job and saving Tamriel every night, so I was really occupied. (Hang on, what do you mean I played Skyrim for more than 200 hours and still yet to defeat Alduin and save Tamriel?)

So yeah, I made this one a bit earlier, but it's mostly law-breaking subclasses and feats. If you want some outlaws in your party, maybe this could help you make something interesting. I hope.

The WWPD&D document "I Solemnly Swear..." can be found here (Google Docs) or here (NaturalCrit Homebrewery).

The entire WWPD&D documents can be found here.

#45. Harmless Ghost Story

Believe it or not, I am a total loser when it comes to horror stories. (But then, I am a loser by default, so that doesn't make much difference.) I mean, I don't have the right quality to enjoy all those jumpscares and goosebumps, especially jumpscares. There is masochistic joy, and there is jumpscares, which are not exactly good for my fragile heart.

But I should admit, horror stories have their niches, and some elements can be used for greater effects in other genres as well. The mystery-solving plot, the cruel twist, the charismatically hideous terrors... All of them are universal, but they shine most when the genre is set to horror.

So I've been indulging myself into recently concluded Five Nights at Freddy's franchise, as well as some other indie horror sensations, and one thought struck my mind: What's up with all these ghosts and their schadenfraude? I won't spoil much of the details (if there are still some things left to spoil at all) but all the ghosts in various games are determined, no, obsessed with tormenting mortals and driving them to suicide, if not outright killing them by themselves. If that is what happens when anyone dies, then I might have my reason not to die. Why can't the dead just leave the livings let live and rest in peace?

I know it's cheesy at best and diabetes-inducingly sweet at worst, but I do think that the ol' friendly ghost trope could be implemented for better effects. Maybe someone is dead, failed or was unwilling to move on to whatever that happens after death, but does not want to kill or worry others. Maybe they want to proceed to the afterlife but can't. (The reason could be serious like "someone else is keeping them from moving on" or "the killer is at large and thus [the ghost] cannot rest," or stupid like "they missed the upcoming Spinal Tap concert" or "[the ghost's] boss would be upset if they didn't show up at work.") Maybe you should help the ghost leave the mortal realm, because like Terminator, they cannot self-exorcise. More than often it would be living people who are more treacherous and deadly than ghosts. The list goes on. It would make a good visual novel story, at least.

So another nitwits on non-existent videogame idea ends here. When would I ever push myself into more committed lifestyle? Aw well, I'll just stick to translation job for now. End transmission.

Weirdo Whover Plays D&D: D&D Wiki Special

Some of the visitors to this squalid blog of mine (if there is any, that is) might recognize this weird handle name from a site known as D&D Wiki. Yes, I was a regular visitor to that site, I did some homebrew stuffs on that sites, and even more reworks and nitpicking. Sadly, the server status and my real life issues have barred me from visiting D&D Wiki these days, and besides, I found r/UnearthedArcana.

Still, I miss the good ol' days, and homebrew stuffs I made back in there. In memory of some of my first homebrews, this Weirdo Whoever Plays D&D article is dedicated to my old works at D&D Wiki.

The WWPD&D document "D&D Wiki Special" can be found here (Google Docs) or here (NaturalCrit Homebrewery).

The entire WWPD&D documents can be found here.

#44. Class-ic Problems

Been some while. Apparently real life strikes harder than ever, okay, not that hard but temporarily harder because I cannot get my hands on new Weirdo Whoever Plays D&D articles (if anyone reads that one at all, anyway). But having a job where your work could be idle at times means you can spare some time for a little chitchat or two, or like myself, post some random stuffs on blog. So here we go:

I have some friends (this fact alone sometimes surprises people, no wonder) who are into doing some creative activities. They are, like many others who shares my period of birth and growth, really into videogames. And as a self-proclaimed geek/nerd/weirdo mutliclass and a local smart-arse, I am often summoned to advise on their creative activities.

One thing that baffled me was, they often gets confused with the concept of job and class. Sure, you character is a warrior, a wizard, a rogue, or anything, yes, but what do they actually do for a living? I once found an example where my friend, after much contemplating and scratching their head, answered, "Dunno, maybe they go hunt monsters and find some coins lying around?"

No wonder I blame videogames for shallow inspirations. (I'm looking right at you, Dragon Quest and Final Fantasy.) I mean, yes, it's convenient game-wise, but if you're writing a story for a cartoon or a novel or something like that, I cannot help but feeling that it's not exactly right or well-thought. For some reason it sounds a bit... lame. Maybe it's because I DM'd a bit too much campaigns these days.

So, as an unsuccessful Dungeon Master, I would like to share my view on class and profession matters. I will be deriving many of my stances from Dungeons and Dragons, because that's what I'm familiar with, and I by far do not insist that my stance is absolute; after all, it's my idea, and while I do think it could be yours as well, I do not intend that it should be.

I think the problem stems on the translation of the word class is the problem in the first place. In Japanese and many Chinese-based part of the world, this is often translated as "profession (職業)", as in, things you do for a living. I, however, think this is very misleading, and it should be more on "role (役割)", as in, what you do in a particular situation, that is to say, what are you in your party.

This is because, the current practice of using class as a synonym of profession sometimes makes little sense. Say, you're a wizard. So what do you do for a living? In fact, what does a wizard actually do for a living? It's not self-explanatory, so ding, it's not a profession. (Just in case: Anyone with enough skills and guts can hunt monsters, perhaps for a living, but that still does not explain how come all wizards in the world are skilled monster hunters.) What do you do for a living as a barbarian? If your answer is unfortunately "mug some civilized people," then how different from you are from a bandit or a highwayman? Ding, not a profession.

Yes, the very idea of class is so gaming stuff in the first place. In many games, this is often mixed with professions, jobs, titles, and whatnots. Some classes are more inclined to specific professions, such as religious classes like clerics, druids, and paladins, or more thematic classes like barbarians, rangers, and warlocks.

However, I do believe that by separating classes and professions, a character could be more interesting and variable. For instance, take your typical shopkeeper (a profession), Mr. John Doe, who runs a grocery store near you. He could be a brawny ex-mercenary who retired from his famed past and settled down for a peaceful life (class: fighter); a part-time hunter and therefore guaranteed to provide fresh and bloody meat as much as you'd pay (class: ranger); an aspiring practitioner of arcane arts who spends his holiday brewing potions from his goods and attending a local Sorcery 101 class (class: wizard); or even an agent of local thieves' guild who, under the facade of happy-go-round store owner, smuggles illegal goods from other regions every night (class: rogue). See? Even a simple store keeper can be anyone, depending on his class.

This works vice versa. Say you have a warlock in your party (a class). This particular warlock could be a sellsword, who kills, maims, and pillages in the name of their patron (profession: mercenary); a local witch doctor who, in exchange for a pouch full of coin and some occasional treats, may concoct you a shady yet surprisingly effective healing ointment (profession: apothecary); the last of their cult, jealously guarding the last piece of relic devoted to their patron, lest it falls into the hand of some oppressive mainstream religion (profession: hermit); or even a noble whose family tradition includes music, poetry, inbreeding, and heathen worshipping (profession: nobleman). If you happen to play a roleplaying game, it's good to try out new combinations, because it makes one hell of joy by playing characters with some amusing class-profession combinations.

Oh, and this is just my idea, but I hate the idea of a character explicitly referring themselves as their class, rather than their professions and other titles. An introduction for a shaman sounds plausible and even awesome if she is "Layla Thorngrove, Daughter of Myria Thorngrove the Fair and Just, Speaker for the Azure Souls of the Viridian Worlds." Not as much if she, of all things she could use, uses something like "a 14th-level druid."

In short: I believe that classes are not professions by essence, and the two must be separated, because it makes more sense in gaming terms and also fleshes out character better with more combinations. As a roleplayer, I think something like this should be more integrated into videogames, especially Japanese videogames. (Yes, my eyes are still on you, Dragon Quest and Final Fantasy.) End transmission.

Weirdo Whoever Plays D&D: Toxic Love

(For the reference, I suggest playing this lovely piece music, from a not-exactly-lovely piece of an animated film, by none other than Tim Curry himself.)

I actually asked my old DM if poison in D&D sucked back in past edition. His reply was no, in fact many poisons were deadly at least back in 3.5rd edition, what with Constitution damage and all. While I do think removing ability score reduction (and addition) was a good move, I felt sorry for poor poison damage, which is now too well nullified by oh-so-many creatures and even characters.

This one is my tribute to some of the least loved damage types, and probably mark my turn to more sadistic approach to my players. As the Ancestor has said in his epic voice, "great is the weapon that cuts on its own."

The WWPD&D document "Toxic Love" can be found here (Google Docs) or here (NaturalCrit Homebrewery).

The entire WWPD&D documents can be found here.

Weirdo Whoever Plays D&D: Homage to the Past

Oldies are goodies. If I ever become famous enough to write an autobiography (which won't happen anyway, but still) that phrase could be the title. So yeah, some conversions from past editions that I have never played at all, because the very concept is freakin' awesome.

Took me weeks to finish this. Most of the time were spent on finding materials and determining which one to convert, and converting work took just as much. I thank my old DM for providing some 3.5e and 4e books, I owe him so much.

Maybe I should gather up my players to playtest this. I'm not sure if they're all balanced enough.

The WWPD&D document "Homage to the Past" can be found here (Google Docs) or here (NaturalCrit Homebrewery).

The entire WWPD&D documents can be found here.